Seriously

I promise I am not a racist.
I do not REALLY think Anoop is a terrorist.
It was a JOKE!!
I mean, come on, LOOK AT HIS EYEBROWS!!!

Baby Baylen

I managed to take Baylen's 1 year pictures yesterday.  Thankfully he was not a runner and I had pain pills!! LOL He did SO good!  You can see others on my site!

POW - Right in the kisser

And thats exactly how it happened.

I was putting winter clothes in the attic and - stumble fart & fall - CRASH!

I trip down the ladder, trip off the washer and land on my butt, then smash my head into the fridge. 

I spent the whole afternoon in the ER. 

After a catscan and a bunch of x-rays I was just badly bruised.

I can't walk very well and I defenetly can't sit or bend over.

SUCK!!! 

Yesterday we went to the omniplex and it was a blast!  

Afterwards we met my dad at red robin. The girls got a balloon on the way out and Lil lost hers in the wind. She was all distraught and I tried to condole her by telling her that her balloon was with Jesus.  Later in the evening when we were on our way to Target Sylvia, my sister, exclaimed - I can see Jesus holding your red balloon!!

Holy cow I have never laughed so hard in my life.

Toby Keith Hates the French

At least that is what the waitress told me when I tried to order french fries at his bricktown restaurant. 

I got my new studio lights!!! I ran downtown and set them up and used Chloe as my model.  I LOVE them :) Bring on the prom suckas

I finally signed up with White House Custom Color.  Not sure what took me so long.  I can now offer double sided announcements and greeting cards. SUPER excited about that one.

The girls are getting their haircuts Friday. Time for the summer bob!  I always look back on pictures when they were young and their hair was so long and think, oh its so pretty!! But it never fails every summer we chop it off again.  Not against their will, of course, they are usually the first to say, I'm ready for short hair mom!

I was watching the color wonder fingerpaint commercials. WHO IS DUMB ENOUGH TO HAVE WHITE FURNITURE AND WHITE CARPET MUCH LESS LET THE KIDS PAINT ON THEM?! Seriously people, I'm thinking, even if it doesn't leave color, it surely leaves a residue. Surley.

Brian was on the SeaWorld site checking for birthday party options.  His boss is taking her daughter there for her birthday.  They have really fun packages where you get to stay the night with either the penguins or the sharks (yeah right) and you get backstage tours and what not.  It is $95  A KID!!! AND YOU HAVE TO INVITE AT LEAST 9 KIDS!! What in heavens name?! Oh Lil, where would you like to have your thousand dollar party this year? Oh, and make sure you keep your gift under $500. AS IF!

Lots of opinions about Idol this evening.

Michael did not do very good. He might be the one to go.  Too bad b/c I really like him.

Lil is great, but I never vote for her b/c I wouldn't buy her music if she won.

Kris has a face like a frog. Seriously a frog.

Adam is a FREAK!! Could he have made that song sound any worse? I don't like him at ALL!

Meagan's boobs were so crazy I wanted to take a nap in them.  She sounded good and I was happy.

Crazy eyes needs some shades.  I hate to say, but I'm so over him.

Matt was freaking amazing. He totally got one of my 3 votes.

Danny is always awesome and always gets my vote.

Alexis didn't do so well, but she didn't do so bad either.  I usually vote for her, but not this time.

Anoop did so good.  I usually really don't like him and he is dubbed the terrorist in our house (I know, totally horrible racist thing so say, but you never know in the kaiser household what is going to come out of someones mouth).  I was pleasantly surprised and I liked his haircut, now if he would only trim those caterpillars that landed above his eyes.

who am I missing.........

Ah yes, this years rocker chick.  Although she is WAY better than last years rocker chick by far.  Allison always sounds good. I just never vote for her. I guess I like others better.

I have picked out my next vacuum.  I have been wanting a dyson for years but Brian tells me that we do not own enough carpet to spend $900 on a vacuum. (yes he exaggerates)  SO while waiting for paint to mix at Lowes the other day, I browsed the kitchen small appliance aisle to drool over the kitchenaid mixers and stainless steel measuring spoons.  I ran across this:

It is a canester vacuum with attachments for carpet AND hardwood/tile! AND it's only $250. AND I think my current vacuum is about to bite the dust (please bite the dust please bite the dust!)  The cool thing about this one too is you can silence it so your hubby doesn't yell at you when he's trying to watch heroes and you feel like you have to clean up the cherios right this very second. (what is the deal with that show anyway?) Also, on the attachments there is a pet hair button and a muddy footprint button. AND it totally goes with my red hair!! YES!

Proof that we watch too much SNL while our kids are awake:

Yesterday Chloe was drawing on her easel when she turned to me with that sassy look, her eyes all the way in the corner of her sockets and her eyebrows raised, and says to me, 

Mom, I'm drawing MacGyver

you are drawing WHO?

MacGyver mom, hes a guy?!

Followed by the ever present eye roll

at least she didn't say McGrubber

lol Pepsuber!

Apparently the thing to do nowadays is have 2 senior photo sessions.  I, myself, have never heard of the likes, but the girls are wanting it, so I deliver!  (can't argue with two session fees - w00t)  I had one inside session when I graduated!  My sessions last about 2 hours, have about a thousand clothing changes and about a hundred locations. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining, I have a ton of fun on senior sessions! It's just different. 

Brian has been faux finishing the walls of the new bedroom.  The painter painted the bedroom Red Cent (a coppery orangey color) and Brian is going over it with a plastic bag and some brown glaze.  It kind of looks like leather and it looks really great.  The new bathroom is called Honey Gold. It makes me happy :)  As soon as he is finished with the glaze our contractor will put up the trim and we can get the carpet in.  

I bought a box of dark mahogany hair color at walmart today.  Don't worry, I'm not going to dye the whole shabang, just accent it here and there.  I'm going to Andrea's in a few so she can help me with it.  I'll post a pic unless it turns out bad, in which case I will be posting a pic of my shaved head.

This afternoon while we were waiting for Granddad at Cici's  Lil wanted to know how babies got in Mommy's tummies.  I told her that when you find a husband and you love each other very much then you decide to put a baby there.  She said, GOD puts it there!  I said, well, you have to have a hubby to help, unless you are Mary.  She said, well, I have a boyfriend! I said, no a boyfriend will not work you HAVE to have a husband. (SHEESH!!!)  Someday she's going to figure out how it REALLY works and be like Hey, wait a minute...

Hi Trecca :)

I finally got some new and different photos hung at the scrapbook store. 20 to be exact!  I did them in a different format than last time and I really like how they look.

Gina got a bunch of new stuff in so I did layouts with some of it.  

Here's the yummy double dot -
Cosmo


Webster's Pages

Bo Bunny Love Shack

The Many Wonders of Webkins

Mom, can I get on the computer when I get home?

Yep

Good, because Sweet pea is like 20 negative hungry

Oh gosh, you should feed her then!

Well, I have to make some money first, I don't have much and  all the cheap stuff is sugar, I can't feed her sugar b/c then she'll get sick.  I could get her an apple though, they are cheap. I am totally done getting her baked potatoes though - SHE JUST WON'T EAT THEM! Even if I put an egg on top.  I guess she doesn't like baked potatoes.

I wouldn't eat a baked potato with an egg on top either, that sounds gross.

Mom, do you know what you see in the middle of nowhere?

Um...no

NOTHING! hahahahaha

(that conversation took an interesting turn)

I am in love

Found a new website full of lovely lovely things.  Add this to my list of stores I'd shop at daily if I had an unlimited budget!  GO HERE

Check this guy OUT!

More conversations with crazy children

Tonight I'm reading the girls a bedtime story.  

I can't seem to get my throat cleared so I have to keep grunting.

Lil says, mom, you have a frog in your throat.

Chloe says, mom, can I name your frog Kelly?

Soon after the lights are out and I leave the room the girls start yelling,

MOM!! SHE WOKE ME UP, SHE WON'T BE QUIET SO I CAN SLEEP!

Knowing that we go through this every night and knowing that whatever I've been saying has obviously not been working, I go for a different approach.

Girls, it is not okay to concentrate on what the other person is doing wrong.  You need to look at yourself and make sure you are doing the right thing.  If you would both look at yourself in this situation you would realize that you are making the noise and then you can be quiet so the other person can sleep.

Lil replies with, Mom, for one thing it is dark in here and we can't even see our faces.  How are we supposed to look at ourselves if we can't see ourselves.

Oh, COME ON!! Not litterally!!!!

This evening in celebrate recovery we watched a really great video!  

Thanks Jared!

Enjoy :)

Fruit roll up on your panties and a Toilet that doots

The following conversation went on between my friend Marci and her little boy (imow)

Mom, I am wearing different underwear than I was when I went to school

What happened?

I got fruit roll up on them

How did you do that?

Mom, it is your fault for sending me fruit roll ups in my lunch. I got them on my underwear and then the teacher had to change them.

But your shirt was tucked in to your pants...they don't let you take food into the bathroom do they?

------

Since the plumber came and put in the new plumbing to include our 2nd bathroom, our toilet has been making a funny psh psh psh psh noise.  Instead of an occasional pssshhh, it pulsates.  Every time, without fail Chloe announces, "Mom, the toilet is doing the doot doot again."  Thanks Chloe.

I love the 80's!!

Carlie had an 80's party at skatetown today.  We had way too much fun with it.  Look how stinking adorable these girls are!!!!  How amazing is Cade's RoboCop shirt?!

Introducing!

Whitney in the Sr Section :)

Love is blind but the neighbors AREN'T!!!!!!!

I... am... angry


On another reality TV show note -

If this girl does not get a wildcard to come back I am not going to be a happy person tomorrow.